To break the siege
select the right driver.
For regional conflicts
a number-three wood works best.
The proper club eliminates
chlorine gas attacks
and most barrel bombs.
Don’t leave your golf shoes in the clubhouse
or waste ammunition on the clubhouse like Putin.
Erdoğan has it right. Golf carts are essential
when dodging sniper fire.
Be considerate of other players.
Iran, Saudi Arabia, and Kurdistan
are eager to play through.
And if you slice your ball into a minefield,
for God’s sake take the penalty stroke
and move on. Save your scorecard.
Your third round is free